01 November 2009

The Unbearable Agony of Dial Up Connections

Yes, I've been Missing In Action, but there was a good reason. I lost my DSL connection, and it took them a week to figure out it wasn't my modem or interior phone lines. So my ISP contacted Qwest to get them to check the exterior lines. And something is wrong. And Qwest is mighty reluctant to fix it, because it involves effort or something. About this time it was 9 days without any Internet, and I was Not Happy. So my ISP gave me a dial up connection while they slug it out with the evil phone empire.


I may come out of this rather twitchy. If not from the antique dial up sound, as it scratches and whines its way to some pathetic connection speed, to the fact that I have to load Gmail in basic HTML, and can't download music, do research, let alone watch Hulu. Who knew so much of the interesting parts of my life were tied to a fast connection?


I've also discovered my 17 inch laptop is great for doing artwork and watching movies on, not so great when tethered to a phone cord and propped up on my knees. It's like having a perpetual 7 pound paperweight. Don't even get me started on the trip to the library last weekend to use their Internet. From the plastic wrapped keyboards to the coughing, hacking drunk next to me, my inner Monk was severely traumatized.


I'm up to Day 12 with no DSL. I keep telling myself there are people in third world countries without any Internet... until I get contacted by a friend who's presently living in one of those third world countries, and has a better connection than I did. Even with DSL. Is there such a thing as a third world state?


On the bright side, I've mopped my Corgi footprinted kitchen floor three times, and carded and spun a whole bunch of wool, including a Leicester/Alpaca/Corgi blend I plan on making into a pair of winter mittens. And I could always check my personal email from work, so I guess I'll have to stop muttering about the IT staff. I even got a bunch of books from my TBR pile read, and wrote one essay on personal mysticism and The Cloud of Unknowing, so it hasn't been all bad. Suffice to say, though, if I want to be cut off from the Internet, I prefer to do it on my own terms. Which means knowing I can plug back in and not be able to knit 12 rows on my socks while I wait for the little blue "You are connected to the rest of the world at pathetically laughable speeds" emblem to appear in my tray.It's shaped like a turtle. Lying on its back. Comatose. Or at least catching some really intense Zs.

6 comments:

...Gray... said...

Aww, that's so funny,...errr. ummm...to hear about, not for you I mean. Hang in there. I think the internet has come to a halt without your input anyway. Hope you're up to speed soon.

Richie Roadrunner said...

Dial up??? Dial up!!!
That is like...so "pedestrian".

DSL stands for "DO Scream Louder".

Maybe I'll mail you a letter.

Constance Brewer said...

Gee, thanks Gray. The drawback of living in a place that use to bill itself "Like No Place On Earth". Now we know why. The rest of the world has DSL or Broadband or two trained monkeys on a pedal generator...

Constance Brewer said...

Gee, "Richie", I wouldn't want you to sprain anything when you attempted to remember how to write. You'd sprain less if you'd actually call me now and then...

Pedestrians R Us....

Anonymous said...

I would call you but your phone is always busy now.

Also...a rule of physics...."The Phone Works Both Ways."

Anonstrodamus said...

I predict you will post Corgi pics minutes after your high speed connection comes back.